A friend of mine reminded me that today is the second anniversary of the death of long-time Korea blogger Shawn Matthews, who tragically took his own life in China in 2006.
Those of you new to Korea or new to the world of blogging may not remember Shawn, but for many of us “veteran” Korea bloggers, Shawn’s was a tremendous inspiration. His presence is sorely missed.
Anyway, his book is still available for purchase online. I’d imagine the money now goes to his family, so consider picking up a copy, especially if you’re planning to come to Korea to teach English.
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Wow, I somehow missed this tragic event when it happened two years ago. I was an avid reader of Shawn’s blog when he was in Korea and China. I remember reading how he would not longer continue his blogging after he had been in China for a while. This is really sad news.
I knew Shawn back when he lived in Ulsan… He was one of the first friends I had here… I cried when I heard about his death. I cried last year when I remembered it. And I’m going to cry again as soon as I get home.
Rest in Peace Shawn… A lot of us will never forget you.
I also remember Shawn and how the a number of members of the community including a leading expat merchant were absolutely viscous with him and his postings, egging him and his girlfriend on with viscous haikus etc. on a couple of well known websites here. I’m not saying they were responsible for his death in any way, but their comments did likely add to his depression.
It really showed the ugly side of the expat community here.
I do seem to recall that side of the tragedy, too.
Yeah Robert, those were some of the ugliest comments I’ve ever seen on the legit message boards here and I’ve been around these boards for 13 years now. I could not believe how ugly a few people were and what was amazing was it was being led by an expat merchant who is still in business here.
Every time people say something nice about the merchant I go back and think about the ugly stuff he said to Shawn and his girlfriend and wonder.
I hope Shawn’s family is doing ok.
vicious or viscous comments? Mean or glutinous?
I remember Shawn the poor old chap. I don’t think a little bit of internet teasing really had anything to do with his depression. He needed professional help from what I heard.
#3,#4 and #5. What a total and utter load of toss. Shawn played his part in that whole forum business. And I guess neither of you have ever participated in a bit of online baiting of a website you thought was in some way lame or stupid? At any rate, IIRC the forum was a private one and neither of you were members, or did you join out of a morbid fascination and just look at what was going on? If so, why did you not get vocal there about that which you thought was so wrong? And to keep associating the death of SM with said merchant two years later is just downright pathetic. Koehler, you are a borderline libelous snake using this pulpit to even suggest that the events were in some way connected; they weren’t and a relative of SM’s posted on the board something to that effect after the incident. Anyhow, instead of hinting at it, why don’t you publish the accusation fully and name the person in question if your convictions are so damn strong? My guess is that you’d end up having your cheap arse sued back to whatever irrelevant, podunk shitehole it is you come from, non?
Keith, re “little bit of internet teasing”: It wasn’t just a little bit. It wasn’t just teasing. And in the final months it wasn’t just on the internet either, with people trying to get his present and/or ex-girlfriends in China involved in their activities, all for the purpose of “getting at” him.
Remember, this isn’t grade 3 – these are supposed to be grown men, some of them “educators”. They were on him for years.
It wasn’t “a little bit of internet teasing”. It was sad and shameful.
No one will ever know what was happening in his head, or whether or how much all of this contributed to what he did. He was clearly a troubled guy.
#7, those posts were not on private forums but well known sites in the expat community, it was one of the ugliest fights I’ve ever seen and I was involved in discussions of how to deal with the posts on the other site. Trust me I know how bad it was and I never want to see another war like that again
The merchant was actively involved some of the nastiest online baiting I’ve seen including making anti-semitic remarks about another poster. They were taking a fragile person and egging him on. They thought it was all fun when it wasn’t.
#8 I do remember the rest of that it going beyond postings on message boards. They acted just like 6th grade bullies in pushing him. Yeah they didn’t push him but just like a kid who does something bad after being bullied they are responsible for some of the conditions that lead Shawn to his end.
I hope this anniversary people remember that sometimes what they say online especially in a mob mentality can have bad consequences.
Aaron, where does it say in Robert’s post that Shawn killed himself because of the mud-slinging? Your feelings of insecurity are making you jump the gun a little, aren’t they?
A borderline libelous snake, eh?
Yeah, Robert, shouldn’t calling you something this be actionable, as libel, too?
Seriously, aaronm’s bit there rivals someone else’s recent meltdown here in my book.
Why all the emotion?
“The merchant”
Yeah, he’s still around. Probably reading this right now.
Why the meltdown, because of all the shit that was spoken in the wake of the event. It was tragic, that is beyond debate, but how the two events are even remotely connected, is beyond me. At any rate the person in question’s business continues to thrive, despite a whispering campaign here and elsewhere that is baseless. Oh, and #10, it’s the ever so subtle implication that is evident if you read between the lines.
#9, get a bloody grip of yourself. How could any of what happened have gone offline, especially when the people you are referring to lived in another country? Having Shawner’s former GF blog on the website in question never happened, so I’d love to see what else you have to back up your baseless assertions.
aaronm — in point of fact, I didn’t say Shawn killed himself because of what transpired online. Shawn was clearly troubled. That being said, the abuse he was taking online couldn’t have helped.
As for the involvement of any particular individuals, well, I don’t know who was leading it, and really, it’s not important. It wasn’t one person.
No, maybe not directly, but in leaving up here the implications that his fighting with a bunch of expats on a forum was in some way connected to the events that transpired a few weeks or months later is grist for the mill. Let me just remind you of your own words above…
“I do seem to recall that side of the tragedy, too.”
Are you not saying here that ‘that side’, i.e his flame war, was part of the ‘tragedy’, to wit, the suicide?
It also didn’t help that Shawn made so much of his personal life public. That’s not to blame him — for that matter, I don’t blame the people who teased/abused (pick whichever you prefer) online — but it is a cautionary tale for those who want to post their personal lives on their blogs.
Anyway, that’s all I’m going to say about this issue. Shawn was a good blogger, and as is the case whenever a young person takes his own life, his death was a tragedy.
RK “I do seem to recall that side of the tragedy, too.”
A: “Anyhow, instead of hinting at it, why don’t you publish the accusation fully and name the person in question if your convictions are so damn strong?”
WTF? In what universe is a hazy memory a damn strong conviction?
Shawn was one of the good guys. I owe him a bunch.
And those people Aaron are defending should continue to feel deep shame for being the worthless cunts they are. Die as soon as you all can.
I had been reading his blog for a while getting excited about first coming to Korea — and I showed up here the day after he killed himself. I was horrified when I found out.
His blog had so much personal info, a reader like myself couldn’t help but feel close to him, despite having never met him.
I am now aware of the problems people had with him and vice-versa — but Jesus, the man is dead. All this bickering is very dark, and doesn’t have any place in talking about a real person with a real family and real problems.
It is easy to hate people on the internet, when they post what they honestly think and feel — I sure get angry at a lot of people on Dave’s.
But please let it go. It is too late to argue about this.
R.I.P. Sean
William G — That was uncalled for. At any rate, what sulperma said is right — it’s too late to argue about this now, and probably inappropriate.
22, yep, you are right. Shawn’s death should be remembered every year as he was a talented writer and as a warning to expats everywhere to seek help for their mental issues. But it should not be perpetually used as a whipping post for people like r.rac (Rocky Racoon on Expatkorea.com) who have a long-standing history of slagging off certain people’s businesses without any basis whatsoever.
“…but their comments did likely add to his depression.”
All of this talk about Shawn being depressed and bothered by comments
on a web forum came about AFTER he died. He may have just slipped
and fell.
#24 I don’t like the guy and will make public his behavior because he is nothing but a bully, he started the famed tigerjew incident on the old expats site, he and his buddies started baiting Shawn and wouldn’t let go. He terrorizes people online because he doesn’t want anybody to say anything nasty about his establishment. He went on a rampage because I mentioned that there other places selling items at a lower price than his establishment.
People who want our business should be held accountable for their actions both in person and online. Did he push Shawn over the edge? No, but his behavior along with that of his buddies in the terrible events did aggravate a delicate person.
Bullies tend to think there are no consequences for their actions that they “don’t really mean it, we’re just having fun”. Well the fun is over for one person and those bullies who tormented him need to be held accountable for their actions. The results of bullies actions do have terrible consequences, see Columbine.
Is there any place online I can access any of his writings, or are his blogs gone forever, and I’ll have to buy his book if I want to know more than this? I’m intrigued.
r.rac — OK, enough.
Don’t worry Robert, I’m done.
It was a very sad event. Shawn was a talented guy who poured his whole life into his blog – it takes a lot of courage to do that.
Rest in peace.
“Don’t worry Robert, I’m done.”
Well, thank all you’ve finished spouting your libelous language, dipshit. Funny thing is, you don’t give a toss about Shawn. You’re just again slagging off a certain merchant, as you do every opportunity you get. You should be as friggin’ ashamed for exploiting his death to grind your axe as those who apparently murdered him.
Word.
Roboseyo,
I tried to leave a comment with the link to Shawn’s archived site but it appears the link caused the comment to be marked as spam.
To read Shawn’s site go to my blog and look at the links under the heading English teacher blogs and click Korea Life Blog.
Thanks, GI Korea.
r.rac… “Don’t worry Robert, I’m done.”
No you are not. You hide behind the anonymity of the internet to attack someone, yet one at least one occasion I can recall that you were in the same place as the guy you love to slag off, you said nada, nothing. You’ll no doubt be back at the next available juncture to continue exploiting Shawn’s death for your own pathetic ends. And to those who think I am dragging this out, well ask RR why he felt the need to bring it up in the first place.
Quit the moronic bickering. If you want some insight into his final days, and the recurring theme (heartbreak — why he left the U.S, why he left South Korea, and what he was going through in China at the end of his life) that may have led to his taking his life, please check out his friend Jake’s blog that Robert even left a link for and read Shawn’s book for his “own” reasons to seek a new life abroad.
http://chinavlog.typepad.com/c.....index.html
Shawn, I enjoyed your writings and insight that has mirrored so much of my own here. I only wish I could have told you in person, and I hope you are at peace.
There is a fine line between a ‘flame war’ and cyberharassment or cyberstalking. Did anyone cross that line? It’s not for me to say…but Shawn’s death sure made a lot of people reassess their online behavior.
I hated Shawn so much that I sent his book off to numerous publishers. Never asked for anything in return.
I hated Shawn so much that I allowed him to sell Island of Fantasy at my store and I took no commission (i.e. he got 100% of the sales). He sold at least 100 copies in my store. This is at a time when I was really pressed for money and success of my business was far from certain. Never asked for anything in return.
When he started calling me names in email I didn’t even come close to saying anything nasty back (still have the emails). This is after all I did for him.
Poems were written about him on a forum I ran. Two or three were even written by me. His ex-girlfriend, whose blog I enjoyed needed money and/or help getting a new blog up and running (to get out from under him) and I offered the $5 a month. All I asked of her was to put a link to the forum (I still have the emails).
Yep, all of that is what drove him to the edge and SLIP.
RR get a life. Become a man.
This is a terrible shame. You all need to let the man rest in peace.
#38,
Yes, there’s more than one side to that story. Thanks for clarifying that.
PS. Irritability can be a sign of clinical depression.
Hello All . Such a shame that all this is still going on . Just A few quick things . Shawns Sister Michele And My son Micheal and my Daughter sierra are upstars sleepping . None of you new shawnn . Why dont you all stop and let me bro rest . His sister and mother are not will and they dot wanna read all this BS all the time . Ps we opened back up the commets page at Chinlifeblog. Goodbye everyone. Soon all will no shawn from age 1 up till his death and why . Im at Dansbones@aol.com
Regarding Shawn, I don’t know anything about flame wars on other sites. (I also don’t know anything about this “merchant” business, nor have I ever really read even Dave’s, apart from the job boards), but I do remember that many of the comments on Shawn’s own site were unusually vicious and tenacious.
Frankly, I think it’s more than a little naive to disallow any connection between that day-in, day-out persecution and his suicide. One could argue that he was prone to depression anyway, but that does not invalidate the idea that it was the events–instigated by other anonymous expats on his own blog–that pushed him over the edge.
Good for you, Robert, for helping us all to remember Shawn and his wonderful blogs.
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