Well, a thoughtful Canadian is marketing a T-shirt for you!
Alleyway T-shirt vendors in the Itaewon district have a new competitor. The new must-have shirts read “I’m not migook” on the front, and on the back in Korean, “I am not an American.” Since the shirts first turned up at a shop in front of the neighborhood Starbucks in the middle of last month, more than 100 of the shirts have been sold every five days. The man who brought the thoughtful product into the world is a 31-year-old named Michael Kenny who would like to make it clear that he is Canadian.
Kenny hatched the idea of starting up his own business only two months ago. “When I started out, it was just to help make money for a trip my girlfriend and I were taking to South America and Australia,” he recalls. He found an untapped niche market: non-American Caucasians in Korea, with their fears of being thrown in the same pot with U.S. citizens. Kenny’s idea paid off. The going price of W15,000 is a little steep for a T-shirt, but that hasn’t stopped droves of European tourists and Canadian and Australian English instructors — fed up with the “everything white is an American” attitude — from snapping up every last one of the shirts. He has already recouped his investment, and from here on out, it’s pure profit for the entrepreneur. His Korean girlfriend says, “We’ve seen for ourselves just how many non-American Caucasians there really are in Korea.”
I’m in the market for a “I’m Not a Low-Quality Canadian English Teacher” jeogori if anyone’s got ‘em.
(HT to ROK Drop)
67 Comments
One can get a better deal by buying a Canadian flag, which usually comes with a backpack sewn onto it.
Good ideal. Asians in America should wear shirts that say “I’m not Chinese”.
ummm….poor analogy….
Chinese represent what? at least half of “Asians” (racially). Americans being any and all strain of humanity represent at best 6% of folks that “might be” American upon first glance.
So this shirt is entirely political and pathetic. I have been in Korea for almost a decade and virtually everyone asks me what country I am from. Unless this “entrpreneur” is upset by 6 year-olds screaming Mi-gook saram ita!, then he is simply a loser Canuck….
My guess is that most Koreans who pass him will fell more or less the same.
Oh and he feels the need to define himself via America…..a very typical Canadian in this regard.
Why not print a shirt telling Koreans he is from Canada. Na-nun Canada-saram imnida!
The more I think about it, the more I wish this man bladder stones the size of peas.
No Slim, they can’t put the Canadian flag on, because then the Koreans, generalizing as is their wont, will say, “So, you English teacher?” And heartbreakingly enough, they’ll always be right.
Besides, “I’m not American” just sounds so much cooler than “I’m Canadian,” because at least it’s got the word American in it.
What about “I’m Canadian…the other white meat.”?
or “Definition of Canadian: an American with universal health care”.
or how about “Canadian: not quite British, not quite American, and not quite Eskimo either…WTF is it?”
or “Canadian: basically a watered down version of an Australian if they happened to live in a tundra.”
Or what about “Funny and talented Canadians go on to be comedians in America…the rest of us teach English in Korea.”
or what about
“Hands off Hans Island or we will turn Denmark into a Sea of Flames!!!”
Or what about
“You know…the country that built that cool robot arm thingy on the Space Shuttle, with a big ass Maple Leaf on it…just to make damn sure you all know where it’s from.”
Tonight I was at the Kyungbok Palace and a little Korean girl ran by, yelling to her older brother in Korean - “Older brother - I saw a black man (woman) - I saw a black man.” She was so cute and happy. I quickly got her attention and told her in Korean “And now you have seen a white man.” It was a very profitable day all around.
I mentioned this to Peter B. and Tom C., who were there with me, that on passing the front of the palace I noticed two endearing images of the riot police. The first was a patrol of two who were entertaining some little Korean children who had dared them to cross the street hopping like bunnies - they complied with their wishes - rather cute.
The second: in front of the palace, just as I walked by - two riot police men were practicing their English with each other (loud enough for me to hear) “Hey man, how you doing?” The other one answered(?) back, “How the f*ck you doing?” English is everywhere and apparently so is the sitcom “Friends.”
or how about:
“Remember Monopoly money? Well we Canucks use that shit for real.”
Or what about:
“Hi, I’m from Canada. Global warming threatens to wipe out two-thirds of our land mass.”
I think Bluejives’ racial insights were funnier than his schtick.
0.91 cents to the dollar and rising. 1.27 Euros to the dollar and rising. Whatever.
Speaking of Australians, I’ve got an idea for an “asian” T-shirt:
Asians don’t get killed by stingrays. We eat ‘em.
Or how about (and I get asked this by black kids alot)
No…I’m not the cousin of Jet Li. Not every chink is the cousin of Jet Li, aight yo? Are you the cousin of Tupac Shakur?
Heh. I would rather be thought of as a GI than an a Canadian English teacher at the moment. How times change.
I’ve always wanted a shirt that said
Yes, I do “computers” and no I will not fix your damn PC.
Says who ? Chinese are both respected and feared here in america. koreans on the other hand….. need we go there ?
DWO: Driving while Oriental.
Yeah, that’s right. I’m a nearsighted kamikaze behind wheels. Look out, mofo’s.
To Chinese people who gripe about Koreans:
Look here. You’re just a Chink but I get to be both a Chink and a Gook, even though I’m just a Gook. So STFU.
What crosses through the mind of kids upon seeing the T-shirt, “Miguk saram!!!!!!”, and adults, “Okay, this guy has issues. I hope he doesn’t look in my direction.”
How about, “I unlawfully run my own t-shirt business and everyone thinks it’s funny and cute. Lisa Vershbow sells a few trinkets and she’s a public enemy. It’s good to be Canadian.”
A couple things… (ohh.. and I’m not American.. I mean.. I am Canadian).
I don’t think the t-shirts are that big of a deal. I mean.. it is standard practice for we northern folk to flame our southern neighbours (with a U.. intentionally)… and if we’re lucky one day someone notices and we feel important.
Personally, I am as proud a Canadian as they come.. but I’ve never felt the need to wrap myself in red and white aside from July 1st. Besides, in Korea what does it acheive. It doesn’t matter if I’m Canadian or American… the majority of the population has a problem with both groups… just for different reasons.
I can understand the t-shirt in the context that it can be a bit damn annoying to hear it an average of 3 times a day (not a hyperbole here). So, sure.. it can be convenient.. and besides.. he’s selling it to Auzzies, Germans, et al.
It is all in good fun, eh?
Oh and correct me if I’m wrong but it was said…
“Remember Monopoly money? Well we Canucks use that shit for real.”
Isn’t the United States the only country in the world that doesn’t use different coloured (U intentional..) money?
I wouldn’t (U intentional) say that, because after all, we do, if you (U intentional) count (U intentional) the new 10s and 20s that everyone complains looks like Monopoly money.
Plus (U intentional) there are lots of countries (U intentional) in the world. I’m certain some use (U intentional) pretty monochromatic money.
Zonath:
You (U intentional) are funny (U intentional)
Bluejives:
Even you (U unintentional) is foony
I went to Canada a couple times and I kept thinking “who the hell is Rogers and why is he on all the billboards?” I saw a franchise called Tim Horton’s everywhere and thought, this place is gay. I saw a billboard advertising a vacation in some Carribean country and it struck me as being very wierd for some reason until it hit me, and I realized: oh shit, it’s a tourism ad for CUBA! On the last day, I ran out of Canukian currency and I asked the cab driver if he would take US bills and he said “sure, not a problem!” On the train ride back in the States, I discovered some leftover Canukian money that I forgot about so I went to the food cabin and asked the guy “can I pay with Canadian money?” He said, “no”.
Latest big development in the Royal Canadian Navy: another new icebreaker.
“Chinese are both respected and feared here in america.”
I can understand that the Chinese, like Arabs, are feared in America, but respected? What are they respected for?
5 points on “Migook”.
Seriously folks, does it really matter so much if you’re mistaken as American, Canadian, or a left-handed, myopic, schizophrenic, hypoglycemic one legged dwarf?
We are all either children of Adam or came out of the same primordial soup. Nationalities are elaborate and artifical conventions of man, not laws of nature.
Blue Jives, you were on a tear, you have me cracking up.
I’m curious. What word did that cute little girl use in korean for “black” ?
Shouldn’t those shirts read “I am not a fooking American”?
(Sorry about the orthography, but I’m a poor speller, you see. Pun intentional.)
Jeffery Hodges
* * *
You must be a retard.
Go and eat your crayons.
Here’s some marketing advice. Michael Kenney, you could instantly double your sales if you replace 미국 (mi-gook) with 미군 (mi-gun) on your products.
Then, after some cunning linguist G.I. kills you, someone else could make a profit selling South Park t-shirts that say “Oh my news, they killed Kenney! You bastards!” on the front and “Blame Canada!” on the back.
Everybody gets Won, everybody gets to hate on another nation, everybody’s happy! Mentos!
bluejives,
you’ve come up with some pretty funny ideas there.
there was a canadian couple in korea that sold t-shirts in my (small) city that said 외국 사람. although i always thought it would be cooler to have a t-shirt that said 시골뜨기.
Koreans’ attitude to Americans: “Go home and take me with you.”
Koreans’ attitude to Canadians: “Two million a month. My pinal opper.”
” you could instantly double your sales if you replace 미국 (mi-gook) with 미군 (mi-gun) on your products”
Not a bad idea at all. Actually it would triple the sales ..as the Real 미군들 want to wear to get in the 홍대클럽, everybody’s happy, eh!
Be born in Canada. Get graduate degree in marine biology or political science. Come to Korea and play the English-language jester for hooting children - for a pittance. See T-shirt saying “I am not an American.” Spend week’s entire entertainment allowance on it. Mistake sniggers of passing Koreans for friendly chuckles.
Bluejives #6. He’s the Man!
bluejives, you obviously don’t know anything about Canada. A new icebreaker isn’t a big addition to our navy…damaged British submarines are. And don’t kid yourself, there are cultural and sociological differences between Canada and the US. Althought there is a certain degree of ’sameness’, regional differences exist within Canada and the US, let alone between the two countries.
Why doesn’t he just say he’s a “second class citizen.”
He’d probably sell more T-Shirts if it said: “I’m not a Canadian.”
Start selling those T-Shirts Robert.
How about: “I’m not American. But like you Koreans, I sure wish I was.”
His Korean girlfriend says, “We’ve seen for ourselves just how many non-American Caucasians there really are in Korea.”
Wow! This couple is really something! WOW! This is how great things start. This is the locus of reality in Korea. Grassroots baby! Going out there and getting the information first-hand.
True. The little lady is quite the anthropologist. But you know she’d upgrade to an American in an instant, if one would only show a little interest.
not a new idea, during the hate-fest/orgy of 2002 I feared going off post for being linched or stabbed like the 8th Army public relations officer, or various others. So that Christmas I requested to my hockey loving sister to send me anything that looked Canadian. Thus I got a shirt with a huge maple leaf on it and the words “100% Canadian”.
I got a lot of confused people passing me on the streets saying “Huh? Are you Canadian?! (WTF?)” Little did I realize at the time that my hair, no where near as short as others in the Army, was still short by any sane persons standard. So they were really thinking “WTF is my countryman doing in the US Army?”. False sense of security…
Not many notice how hard they stick out. I’ll now I spot guys with crew cuts, plain old blue out-of-fashion american levis, ratty PT running shoes and a t-shirt, and ask “so what unit you in?” and get “uh. .. I’m a … Canadian .. English teacher”. ….Relax bro, I’ve been there before.
oh, and Bluejives, the company that made the arm for the space shuttle… (Canadarm) yeah just like most canadian companies, they were bought out by an American company sometime around 2000.
so its really:
“Hi, I’m Canadian, but ass is pwned by the Americans”
“Hi, I’m from Canada, the 51st state…”
“Canada, no one lives there, but we got a lot of trees!”
just kidding, they got bitumen too, and thats cool (Canada, the next Saudi Arabia!)
montclaire wrote:
Koreans’ attitude to Americans: “Go home and take me with you.”
Koreans’ attitude to Canadians: “Two million a month. My pinal opper.”
LOL. That is both funny and true. Every American is assumed to be a GI and every Canadian is assumed to be a low grade English teacher here. Both are pretty much looked down upon by most Koreans so there is no escaping the stereotyping and racism that exists here. But even with all the anti-Americanism going on, most Koreans still secretly wish for the Big PX in the Sky though they will never openly admit it. Canadians on the other hand are viewed as American’s poorer and less fortunate cousins. Don’t shoot the messenger, I’m just stating what I’ve heard from dozens of locals.
I want a shirt that says……”I’m Swiss and we kicked Korea’s ass in the World Cup”.
I should be honest for a moment before someone to clear something up before someone gets confused and think me a hypocrite.
A. I love Canada, its a brother nation
B. Like brother nations, citizens of each like to rag on each other
C. Also like brother nations, the other is there when one really needs it
D. Don’t *&^% with my brother.
i always thought a bin Laden motif on a t-shirt (a la Che Guevara t-shirts) would be great.
wouldnt need to write “i shit on americans” or anything, the image would be enough.
maybe the nike swoosh symbol and WTC on the back with “just do it”
anyway, there are a lot of nice t-shirts we can wear, but they dont hide the beer belly
captbbq, the engineers at the company that designed, built, and programmed the robotic arms for the space shuttle and the international space station quit in mass after it was bought out by the Americans (one of my oldest friends was one of them).
captbbq wrote:
…
just kidding, they got bitumen too, and thats cool (Canada, the next Saudi Arabia!)
captbbq wrote:
…
just kidding, they got bitumen too, and thats cool (Canada, the next Saudi Arabia!)
America’s Reaction
Our latest intelligence has also confirmed that certain Canadian nationals planted within our borders, including Robin Williams, Mike Meyers, Colin Mochrie, Avril Lavigne, Jim Carrey, and Celine Dion are actually covert members of underground cells whose purpose is to secretly undermine our society, media, culture, way of life, and take jobs away from our own hardworking American celebrities. It has also been determined that Celion Dion’s voice, Jim Carrey’s acting, and Colin Mochrie’s face are weapons of mass destruction…
Bluejives: there was a Canadian mockumentary in the 80s playing on that exact theme. It was done like a US-style shockumentary (is that a word? It should be!). The key “conspirator” was Lorne Greene, natch: Lorne Greene –> Green Card!
I’m a Canucklehead born and bred, proud of my country, and even know the lyrics to God Save the Queen, but I never bought into this kneejerk type of nationalism—especially when it’s done to smugly differentiate ourselves from the States. I’d never wear a T-shirt like that, but you gotta admire the the guy’s entrepreneurial skills, since he sensed a market and went for it.
On my first trip to Korea, I had really, really short hair. I got asked twice in the space of 24 hours if I was a GI. I just politely said “No,” and left it at that. I didn’t self-righteously proclaim that I’m a Canadian, blah blah blah. And as many commenters have pointed out on this thread and elsewhere, in Koreans’ eyes these days, being Canadian isn’t necessarily anything to be proud of!
Heck, if sensationalistic English-teacher stories continue and the Roh-nothings are ever kicked out of office and a normal relationship to the US restored, you might see Canadian English teachers with Old Glory sewn onto their backpacks, lol!
The Canadian Conspiracy (1985), starring (among others) SCTV alumni John Candy, Joe Flaherty, Eugene Levy, Martin Short, and Dave Thomas, as well as Lorne Greene himself, Margot Kidder, Leslie Nielsen, and William Shatner. Morley Safer and Anne Murray also made cameo appearances, and Steve Martin appeared as an outraged American.
Check out some of the quotes, too.
Man, I forgot about that show! It was a hoot. Every time they showed a clip of Ottawa, they picked a deep-winter shot, with lots of snow plus wind howling on the soundtrack.
Cancel “shockumentary.” After looking the word up on the Internet, I see it stands for a whole genre of pretty lurid stuff. Poor choice of words. But you get the idea.
Wait a minute…Eugene Levy is Canadian? You mean the guy with the dry monotone voice who always seems to act the part of the boring high school teacher in movies about teenagers? They have Jews up in Canada too?
BTW, thanks for the movie tip, Sewing. Definitely gonna check it out.
“You must be a retard.
Go and eat your crayons. ”
Mr. China, the fact of the matter is that if the Chinese were respected in America or anywhere else, with all sorts of bad behaviours such as kidnapping for ransom, threatening business operators to collect money, maintaining abysmal hygiene in the Chinese restaurants, not to mention spitting anywhere, talking loudly, eating noisily etc, there would be almost nobody who wouldn’t be respected there.
If you still wish to argue your case, present the evidence instead of calling name without any backup.
What’s with all the flak on this light hearted and fun tee shirt, it’s not anti-american, it just gets get pretty damn annoying how often you get referred to as one.
This is just the same as Koreans getting pissed in Europe with the amount of people greeting them with “Konnichiwa.”
Climb off your high horse rapoki.
He not defining himself via america, he’s defining himself and those who buy the tee-shirt as not american. It’s a light hearted joke, and a very, very old one at that.
It’s not flak, Arghaeri, it’s light-hearted and fun. And defining onesself as not American is indeed defining oneself via America.
Montclaire,
Some, not all, light hearted, and whilst I see your semantic point, I do not see that identifying yourself as not being American, is in the context anything more than a light hearted joke. It is not defining oneself via America as stated, since it say’s little more about your identity than I’m not a carrot. Would this be defining yourself via vegatables?, and it certainly doesn’t define oneself as a loser canuck?
I’m not a canuck by the way.
Oh shit, I’ve just defined myself via Canada!!!
You have indeed, Arghaeri.
bluejives, of course there are Jews in Canada. That’s why we have Montreal smoked meat and Montreal baggles (boiled and baked in a wood oven). Carl Reiner is another famous Canadian Jew, by the way.
Oh, and I almost forgot…the Weider brothers (the guys that made bodybuilding the huge industry that it is now).
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[...] Other foreigners doing a bit of moonlighting include the wife of the American ambassador who makes jewellery, and the Canadian who’s doing a roaring trade selling “I’m not an American” T-shirts in Itaewon. There’s a good thread of comments going on the latter story over at the Marmot’s hole. [...]