day 5: i just can’t stand it…
okay, so i like to claim that i know a fair bit about football and like to write bollocks about it, as if you might not know. however, it’s becoming pretty clear in this world cup that any team i’m cheering for is either not going to win or is going to play poorly.
as i’ve mentioned somewhere before, one of the beauties of the world cup is, during the first two weeks of the competition, if you’re a true footie fan, to go through each game as it comes and pick a team for whom to cheer for those particular 90 minutes. for example, in this year’s second match–poland v. ecuador–a game played at 4am, korean time, i chose to cheer for ecuador. now, i have neither polish nor ecuadorian blood in me, i’ve never lived in either country, i don’t know polish and i’ve forgotten nearly all of my spanish, and could give a monkey’s earwax about either team on most any other day in a typical four-year, non-world cup span.
however, on this particular saturday morning at 4am not so long ago, i found myself cheering rabidly for the south americans. why? who the hell knows? who the hell cares? it’s just one of the beautiful vagaries of being a footie fan and being obsessed with the world cup.
i’ve not watched a single group stages match of any recent world cup and not chosen a team to support. now, admittedly, once the tournament advances to the latter stages, the knockout rounds, i’m less inclined to cheer so randomly for teams i have no ties to. it’s just a group stage thing, for me, at least, and, usually, i’m a sucker for the underdog, which brings me to this…
witness the statistics of my poor performance of supporting teams (*note from editor, who thinks that dave writes with too many comma splices, run-on sentences, and asides {as an aside, if you know what a comma-spliced aside is, please email me at editorsarejustwriterswhocantwrite@f*ckoff.com}, this email address may or may not be real; please utilise at your own risk):
- matches played thus far: 14
- matches involving teams for which i have a true affinity: 9 …which leaves matches that i chose at kickoff teams to cheer: 5
- world cup strips i own: 10
- number of times wearing a strip has had a positive effect on the team represented: 2
of the true affinity matches, i have chosen correctly twice (england and holland) and even one of those choices–england–played one of the worst matches and was gifted one of the flukiest goals in the history of the solar system. of the remaining five, i’ve only chosen correctly once (ecuador). so, this means that in the first five days of this world cup, i’ve cheered for the winning side only three times. and this is doesn’t include the two draws in the tournament thus far.
it’s gotten so bad, so ridiculous, that last night, papa geno (http://tchitcherine2.blogspot.com) asked me if i had a strip of a team i didn’t like. it was then and there that i realised i’ve been spending my money unwisely…
conclusion: if you’re a fan of teams i don’t like and don’t cheer for, you’re in luck and in damned great shape to come out of this thing happy.
*oh, and for all of you obsessed with korea footie and think that all things korea in the world cup are so fresh, exciting, and innovative, i have good news for you: i do not own a korean strip; however, if my bad karma towards teams whose kits i do have continues, you can bet your sweet little crazed buns i’ll be buying one…
2 Comments
A lot of guys these days are contemplating a skinny high cuff pant with the shirt not tucked in, BUT that doesn”t mean I’m going to wear it.
I think that’s where you’re going, but at some point you have to give in, otherwise you’ve never tested your character and in the end your choice is meaningless.
I like Poland tonight over Germany. Where are you?
H&T, that’s weak. Poland over Germany? I can top that. How about Ukraine over Spain? They’re only down by three right now and down one player. Now that’s a real prediction.
This soccer posting thing will eventually lead to actual reviews of actual games right?